Beware THE SEQUESTER!

It stalks the land. It feasts on the young. It fears the Old.

It is unstoppable. It is fearless.

The Sequester!

Never have we seen anything like it. It’s HUGE. It’s voracious!

Politicians tremble in its wake. Or quake in its presence.

A small band of Sequesterers cheer it on. Shoveling huge chunks of money at its maw.

Who can stand up to it?

NO ONE! It is relentless and will not be stopped.

BEWARE THE SEQUESTER!

Unless you’re over 65.

In which case, YOU are the problem, living too long, feeding at the public trough, sucking the life out of the national treasure.

Beware old people. Your entitlements could be next.

No one ever expects SEQUESTER TWO!

Bobbing for Brains

Headline:

"Obama Seeking to Boost Study of Human Brain"

Suggest start with Congress, if you can find a brain among them.

Happy New Year and Hello Again

OK, I've been remiss. I haven't posted since last May. Sorry about that.

So we'll try again to keep you up with my musings. The following has been on my mind for a while. Try it on yours.

Ode to Congress

You kept me dangling
nerves a'jangling
Upper lip stiff
On the Fiscal Cliff.

Now I'm reeling
Queasily feeling
Suspensefully dealing
With the debt ceiling.

Must we lurch
from perch to perch
without surcease
to fiscal peace?

In our lifetime?

Help!

Pundit Pity

Pity the poor pundits. They are right all the time. But, if their opinions brook no contradiction, are they no longer opinions but, in fact, fact? No wonder we are confused.

It has to be hard to come up with a 600-word essay twice a week. I have trouble creating a few paragraphs every so often that I hope will be interesting and perhaps amusing. And I'm not trying to convince anyone of anything. And I certainly don't get paid for my efforts.

This is not to say I don't have opinions. But so many opinions are flying around all sorts of media I confess I'm intimidated to offer my own. Thus, I'm not disappointed if no one pays attention to me.

Not so for the pontificating pundits who constantly offer their opinions on how to right the wrongs of the world. I hope they're not frustrated at the end of the day when they realize their words fall on deaf ears. But do not fret, dear pundit, I'm always curious about you may say next.

So keep opining, Oh, pundits fine, the field is yours, the decisions mine.

Me and Warren

Warren Buffet revealed today he has prostate cancer. He's almost 82. Welcome to my world, Warren.

I was just 80 when I got my diagnosis. That was almost a year ago. Many guys our age have had or will have prostate cancer any time now. It's part of the aging process.

Matter of fact one of my golfing buddies called me during the winter and said he had been diagnosed with it. He wanted to know how I was treated and what he could expect. I was happy to talk with him.

So far, Warren hasn't called me but if he should I'd be happy to talk to him; tell him all about the treatment process. But he probably doesn't need my advice. I suspect doctors by the score are offering Warren their services. Afer all, he is one of the world's richest men. He's probably covered by Medicare anyway.

Meantime, Warren says he feels fine and so do I. Let's keep it that way, buddy.

Make Room for The Superkinders. Please?

According to the NY Times, New York City is awash with applicants for its gifted and talented public school KINDERGARTEN classes.

Naturally, it's the anxiety-ridden parents who are driving this phenomenon. Which, of course, has opened up opportunities for a host of testing and prep services for these privileged kiddies.

Testing for admissions to KINDERGARTEN? I thought you just had to be toilet-trained. Now, according to the Times, you have to test above the 90th percentile to even have a look-see at these select classes. And what if you don't get in? Do you take your percentile and go home or join the other five-year-old’s in the playground?

One parent is concerned that his kid's 99th percentile test result might not get him in. Geez!

About 76 years ago a five-year old from the Bronx held his mother's hand as she ushered him into his first day at PS 90. About all he remembers of the day is pulling some girl's braids and the teacher telling him to stop. He passed the test of being a five-year-old boy.

Back By Popular Demand!

Now Playing at a Blog Near You!

“The Return of Muddling Marv!”

Encouraged by an overwhelming desire of his fans (at least three), The Muddler is resuming blogging after a lengthy bout of:

a) Jet lag. b) Lingering jet lag. c) Aggravated laziness, followed by d) a severe case of writer's block.

But enough excuses. The truth is that after more than a year of nightly blogging I ran out of steam. And after a two-week-plus visit with our Israeli family, the flight home wiped us out.

Last year I tried to follow the blogger's code: write every day, more than once a day if you have something to say. I liked the challenge but I realized that just before bed time is not exactly the best time of day to be productive.

OK, so what's been happening since I last wrote at the end of February?

Mitt Romney is still running for the Republican presidential nomination but his opponents are not. I hear he's looking for a Veep candidate he can strap to the roof of his car for the trip to the White House. Good luck with that.

The Republicans still hate the Democrats and anything they propose. The Democrats are too timid to hate back. Bi-partisanship? What's that?

Tim Tebow comes to the Jets. They still don't have a prayer for the Super Bowl.

Jeremy Lin jump-starts the Knicks and then suffers a season-ending injury. He was fun while he lasted.

The Mets opened their season strong and then got shut out by the Nationals, of all teams. Same old, same old Mets?

The Yanks lose three to the Rays (no surprise there) and then take three from the Orioles (no surprise there, either.) The real season starts tomorrow when they meet the Pujols-powered Angels.

My son, Rob, loves the Tigers and with Cabrera and Fielder hitting 3-4, who can blame him. And until someone proves otherwise, Verlander is still the best pitcher in the AL. Go kitties. (But not further than the Yanks.)

I'm not promising a daily dose but we'll do our best to keep up the flow.

That's all for now. And it's only 8:35 p.m.