Tuesday, February 18, 2014

"Murderer's Row"

What better time to think about warm weather than when you're snowed in.

It was the 1940's into the early 50's. I lived on the first floor of a six-story brick apartment building in The Bronx (note the capital T, please). Whenever weather permitted, a group of older women would sit in a line on the sidewalk in front of the entrance to the building.

I called it “Murderer's Row” because I had to walk past them whenever I entered or left. I could feel their eyes on me all the way. Although we lived in the same building, I didn't know any of them. They never said anything to me nor I to them. But they made me feel self-conscious.

To be fair, these were pre-air-conditioning days and fresh air was where you found it. If it meant sitting outside for an hour or two with friends that was what you did.

A few years ago, on the way home from the Bronx Zoo, I drove past the old neighborhood. No one sat outside buildings. Instead, there were iron gates across the entrances to most of the old apartment houses.

That was then, this is now.


Saturday, February 1, 2014

I’m Psyched for Super Sunday

My costume is ready:

Down coat
Fur hat with earlaps
Wool muffler
Mittens
Heavy socks
Storm boots
Field glasses
Can’t wait for the day to begin
Eyes on the prize!
Ready to cheer
Ready to moan
Ready to thrill
For Punxatawney Phil!
IT'S GROUNDHOG DAY!

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

The State of My Mind

As I prepare to ignore tonight’s State of the Union Address and all those TV shots of fawning or fuming politicians sitting through it, I wonder how the “new media” will he playing it. Chances are I won’t know because I don’t get my news from new media.

Yet, according to David Carr in yesterday’s New York Times, “web news is thriving.”  Really?

Vox Media, BuzzFeed, Upworthy, ViralNova are experiencing explosive traffic, writes Carr. I’m sure I've left out others and for that I apologize. I just can’t keep up with them. In fact, the only time I come across these new names is in the newspaper. Yes, the newspaper, stolid old media.

My impression is these digital domains move content so fast they can’t possibly have time to digest or impart meaning or context to their posts. I also hope their speed doesn't compromise their accuracy. I suspect I’ll never know, since I’m wedded to getting my news from more established, credible sources.

Hence, I’ll scan tomorrow’s newspapers in print or on line to read the predictable reactions to President Obama’s State of the Union speech.

My mind will be in its usual state of muddle. 

Saturday, January 25, 2014

Good News

I'm out of the wi-fi rabbit hole.

I returned the recalcitrant printer and for a few bucks more replaced it with one that works well with my laptop. Proving once again that cheap is cheap.

My first order of printing was to go back to the article that triggered my descent into what for me is internet hell. Yes, I printed via wi-fi a 2005 article from the New York Times that I no longer need.

The satisfaction was perverse, but satisfaction nevertheless.

Speaking of perverse, how's this for perversity: I just finished reading today's New York Times on the web and then went into the kitchen to wash the newsprint from my hands. Yikes!

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Stymied

I started blogging two years ago with the idea that technology is Wonderland and I'm Alice. I've tried to understand it and even adopted some of its trappings, but I still feel I'm down the rabbit hole, as it were.

Bear with me, please. In view of all the controversy over NSA eavesdropping, I thought it might be a good idea for the government to out-source the job to those call centers used by virtually all major businesses. You know, the one's who tell you how important your call is and that it may be monitored for quality and training purposes.

Believe it or not, someone listens to those calls and decides whether to respond to them. I found this out by Googling the subject and came across a well-documented article in the New York Times in 2005. Disappointed that someone beat me to the story by nine years, nevertheless I wanted to print it for future reference. But my printer broke down.

I was so frustrated by not being able to print this article I neglected blogging. Why did I care? I'm uncomfortable with words flying through the air with no place to land. They belong on paper. So they can be referenced (and maybe even leaked?).

Anyway, I installed a new printer and now my laptop can't find the Wi-Fi connection. So I'm down the rabbit hole again.

But back to out-sourcing. I've been on the phone any number of times lately with technical services, phone companies, banks and whatever, and they all assure me that my call is important to them before putting me on hold so I can listen to their awful time-filling music.

Once I actually told someone I hoped my call was being recorded because I wanted the company to know how infuriating it was trying to reach a real person who actually could help me.

If you're still with me I want you to know how important your readership is to me. If you need individual attention you can reach me at marvfriedman@verizon.net.

Your email will be monitored for quality and training purposes.

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

A Slow News Day

It's gotta be a slow news day when Mayor de Blasio eating pizza with knife and fork deserves a whole column from Maureen Dowd in today's New York Times.

As did Ms. Dowd, my wife and I also howled at Jon Stewart's takeout on the mayor's gustatory gaffe (to pizza purists, anyway). He was in Staten Island, after all, fingers-first country. But a whole column, Mo? Maybe it was just “let's give Chris Christie a break day.”

OK, full confession: sometimes we, too, start a slice with knife and fork to spare the roofs of our mouths from being scorched. But then its full-fold-fingers mode right down to the crust, as long as that's not too thick.

Politicians have always tried to win ethnic votes by publicly tasting their favorite foods. It's a lot easier to appeal for votes with sticky fingers than sticky issues. 

Now let's get back to real meaty news: SCANDALS.  

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Welcome to My World, Chris

I've been reading about the impact of the Fort Lee traffic mess on Gov. Christie's political future. And this comment really hit home.

In today's New York Times, Michael Barbaro notes that in the middle of this mess, Gov. Christie had to deliver his State of the State address to the Legislature. Not that he could do anything about that. But Mr. Barbaro goes on to quote a professor of political science and law at Montclair University as saying the speech is “too close to the scandal.”

“The reality is,” she says, “is that this governor has to muddle through this one.”

Now that's something I'm familiar with, muddling that is. After all I am “Muddling Marv in the Modern World.” Think the Guv would be interested in my muddling methods?

Perhaps we should meet. No preconditions, no promises made, nothing expected in return.

Call me?

Sunday, January 12, 2014

Are We Ready For...(TaDa)

“Gates Gate?” Surely the media will slap that moniker on the ruckus created by publication of former Defense Secretary Robert Gates' memoir, “Duty.”

It is my obligation to tell you that I haven't read it and probably won't. That doesn't mean I can't have an opinion on it, like most of the pundits who relish the dish of dirt Secretary Gates serves up on President Obama and others in government.

Actually, I'm reserving my opinion till smarter people tell me what to think. Like my wife, for instance. After watching the “60 Minutes” interview with Secretary Gates tonight, my wife thought he should not have said disparaging things about a sitting president. I'm sure the fur will be flying in all directions for some time, buddy photos of Obama and Biden notwithstanding.

Between “Gates Gate” and “All A-Rod All the Time,” does anyone remember "Bridgegate?" You know, Governor Chris Christie's traffic/political jam. And why aren't we calling it "Bridget-gate," after poor Bridget Kelly who took the fall for four days of traffic snafus in Fort Lee, NJ. Just saying.

On the other hand, let's give the “gate” tag line the gate. Remember, the tag line started with “Watergate” which was a real name. All subsequent “gates” have become journalistic shorthand for any type of chicanery.


We should be better than that.  

Saturday, January 11, 2014

With Apologies to Shakespeare

Hamlet is reading the Star-Ledger this morning, commenting to his bud, Horatio, on the picture of Governor Christie at his news conference:

"Alas, Poor Chris, I knew him well...a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy of his own omnipotence. And now, look at him, how abhorred he is.

“Where be your jibes now, Chris, Your outrages, your flashes of temper that were wont to set the audience on a roar? Not one now to mock your own grinning? Quite chap-fallen?”

"Tell me, Lord Mayor of Fortress Lee: Dost thou think Chris will look to this fashion in the polls? And Smelt so? Pah.”


Horatio: “Just so, my Lord”.  

Friday, January 10, 2014

Ode to The Guv

Pity poor Christie
It makes my eyes misty
seeing him squirm
like a humongous worm
caught on a hook
not by a crook
but foisted by pals
including a gal
he put into jobs
where they could toss lobs
at at political foes
who might cause him woes.

What now Chris?
What else is amiss?
Your future plans
In the frying pans?

As Guvs go
So should you.
Now, not later,
alligator.

But knowing Chris
he'll hiss
and bluster,
muster his forces
to mount their horses
to attack and attack.
“There's no going back!”

But you may hit a snag
when your E-ZPass tag
won't pay the toll
to get out of this hole.


Thursday, January 9, 2014

I'm Worried

No one asked me to endorse Chris Christie, so I didn't vote for him. Either time. Now I'm waiting for the traffic cones to be put up on my suburban street, blocking the kids from being driven to school.

Christie would say, let them walk, its healthier for them And it saves gas. They're probably democrats anyway.

Let's do some damage control, a la Christie:
  1. Change the name of the George Washington Bridge. Call it the Bridget Kelly Bridge to Nowhere. She's already there.
  2. Change the name of Fort Lee. Call it Trenton-lite. Just as snarled but more picturesque.
  3. Give a toll-free day to all east-bound motorist using the bridge. Maybe several. It couldn't hurt.
  4. Oh, and for heavens sake, (as Jon Stewart prompted) say you're sorry. 
Sure to be continued. 

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Rescued by Michael

When last we left Mr. and Mrs. Muddler they had stretched a flannel blanket across the entrance to their den to keep the frigid air from creeping into the rest of the house, the room heater having lost its pilot light.

When Michael, a Public Service technician, arrived later this morning he was astonished at how cold the back room was, considering the rest of the house was fine. The blanket had done its work.

He was more astonished when he looked at the source of the problem. That gas heater was here when we bought our house more than 50 years ago. It was much older than Michael and he had never seen one like it.

Nevertheless, he was equal to the task and after a few false starts got it working. In less than four hours the den temperature was back to normal.

And, needless to say, so were we. It made my birthday a very happy one.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

The Sheet Rocks!

Compared to what other folks are going through with this blast of Nordic air, we've had it relatively easy. Until this morning, when the pilot light on the gas heater in our back room went out. I assume high winds during the night knocked it out.

That heater is a Godsend. It was here when we bought our house 50 years ago and we rely on it to keep the den warm. When it goes out, the cold air creeps into the dining and living rooms and it's just uncomfortable.

In fact, during the 2012 Halloween snowstorm that knocked out our heat and electricity for six days, the only thing that kept our home habitable was that little gas heater in the back room.

As the temperature dropped near zero last night and this morning the back room got colder and colder. It used to have doors that we could close to isolate the room, but we took them down long ago to make a flow-through living area.

What to do until the cavalry (i.e. Public Service) arrives in the morning? My wife says “Let's put a sheet across the entrance to the room.” Great idea, I said, but why not something heavier?

Agreed. So we took the flannel sheet off our bed and I taped it across the entrance to the room. It's not perfect but it will help keep the house a little warmer until help arrives.


Brrrrilliant!

Monday, January 6, 2014

How to Avoid Writing

There are so many ways:

Wash the dishes.
Dry the dishes.
Slice chicken for supper.
Make Russian Dressing (what a mess that was).
Read the The New York Times (the real paper, not on line; great article by David Carr about a 472-page, 4.5 pound REAL BOOK (“Cool Tools”). Doubt if I'll buy it or read it but it was fun reading ABOUT it.
Answer emails, delete spam.
Play a game or two of Spider Solitaire.
Go back to the Crossword.
Get the laundry from the dryer.

All the while the blank screen stares at me.

I stare back and find some other piddling chore to do to delay the inevitable.

Write, scribe, write. Something, anything. Just, as Nike says, DO IT!

Done.


Friday, January 3, 2014

Blocked

I have been blocked by the “Blocked Sender” list. No matter how many times I block Key West Vacations, Belize Vacations, Sanibel Vacations, Lower Mortgage Rates, Buy a Foreclosure, and even Female Seduction enticements, they keep flooding my in-box.

What's a person to do? It's easier to just keep deleting them than trying to block them. If you click on “block message,” you get a question: “do you want to block this message and if you do, all subsequent messages from this sender will be blocked.” It's a myth. Doesn't happen.

No subsequent messages are blocked. The senders change their email addresses just enough to let their come-ons slip through the alleged blockade.

If someone has a solution to this problem I'd like to know about it.

Oops, just got an email from a company offering me “50K coverage, no credit required.” None given, either.

There is no end to this. (Sigh.)

Thursday, January 2, 2014

Remembrances of Storm Coverage Past

As I watched the TV lead ups to our current snow storm I couldn't help remembering when I was in charge of orchestrating this kind of coverage as Metro Editor for WCBS-TV News, Ch. 2, in the 1970s.

Some things haven't changed much in 40 or so years. The correspondents are reporting from the usual choke points, the weathermen or women are literally in their elements predicting as best they can what we can expect. But tempered but major hurricanes and Katrina-like disasters, public officials now take no chances. States of Emergency have been declared, schools are closed and we've all been warned to batten our hatches, stock our larders (if we have any) and stay out of the way.

Today, we take for granted the blanket coverage TV gives with live reports from all over the world. When I started in TV news we still had film cameras; once shot on location, the film had to be brought back to the lab for processing and then edited for air. A laborious process.

I still remember when we got our first video camera. We couldn't wait to broadcast LIVE from a remote location. Where was it? On the sidewalk outside our building. The weatherman was reporting in real time from 30 feet away. Never mind what he had to say, the fact was he was reporting LIVE.

One small step for live broadcasting so many years ago.


Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Let's Try Again

I last blogged on March 16, 2013, railing, at that time, against The Sequester. Well, you all know what happened after that. Millions took pay cuts or lost their jobs altogether and eventually the government was shut down and we had to cancel our vacation to DC.

But this is a New Year and we're going to try again to keep current. I'm not into the bests and worsts of last year, nor do I have "great expectations" for 2014. As an octogenarian, my lists more or less incline toward smaller expectations.

For example: getting out of bed in the morning and making it through the day without dropping something or hurting anyone, myself included.

I'm still battling modern technology, tho. My latest bugaboo is the flood of spam clogging my email box. I have engaged the "block message" application but that hasn't stopped the flow of spam from the same sources I've been "blocking." How do they get through?

I did indulge in a smart phone but often miss messages because it's on "vibrate" because the beeping from those spam emails drives me nuts. I do not have a Twitter account and I rarely look at Facebook. So much for me and social media.

Well, it's the first of the New Year and I don't want to wear out my welcome right away.

So Happy New Year and stay tuned.